Monday, December 9, 2024

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America first – Denmark second

DonalHolland and other European countries might think that they are the best choice for the second greatest country after the US. But we in Denmark think otherwise. Here’s why.

(Watch his hands, Dutchlings!)

THIS IS A MESSAGE FROM THE GOVERNMENT OF DENMARK

Hi Donald. It’s us. Your friends in the North, Denmark. We just wanted to tell you that we – the Danish People – not the Pastry…which is delicious by the way. You should try it, it’s tremendous. Anyway – Denmark loves you! Forget the Netherlands – they are a Disaster – Okay? And Holland too. Total disaster… I mean, come on, whate are you people? Netherlandish, Dutchlings, Hollandrians? It’ stupid. Make up your mind, The Netherlands. Anyway, the Hollandrians tried to tell you, that their language is the bestest language. Wrong! It’s disgusting! for example, just listen to how they say “Moped” [Bromfiets]. We on the other hand have the best words, Okay. Like: Kiksekage and Kakkelovn and Kolddampsatomsabsorbtionsspektrofotometri. The last one has something to do with how you measure the water content in Rye Bread, our National Bread by the way. It’s delicious. You’ll love it. We have some really great, wonderful people here. Terrific ones. It’s true. You guys have all the best people of course. Like elvis, Dr. Phil, Jason Priestly, who might actually be Canadian? Who cares, now he’s American. Boom! That’s an alternative fact. Period. Lucky him! You have the Statue of Liberty. We have … The Little Mermaid. But don’t let the name fool you, okay? The Little Mermaid is actually pretty huge. Not little but huge – like your Hands are huge. The HUGE Little Mermaid. Like your hands, Okay? The Statue is actually based on a fairytale by our most beloved writer, Hans Christian Andersen, who made up stories that filled everybody with hope an joy. Just like your made up stories fills up all people with … you know… Anyway. He couldn’t do it in 140 characters like you though. He could’nt do it. What a loser. Total loser. Sad!

Every Second Counts

US President Donald Trump said “America First”. This is Danish TV Show Natholdet’s (Night Team) contribution to the Pan-European satire campaign: ’41 countries all over the world participated, millions of people watched the videos, every country wanted to claim the title of the second greatest country of the world. The result was very, very funny, believe me, best videos ever. Click this page. It’s huge. Like Donalds hands. It’s the funniest website in the world! Believe us!’ everysecondcounts.eu

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